Young urban professionals Jesse (Arye Gross) and his girlfriend Kate (Lar Park Lincoln), move into an old mansion that has been in Jesse’s family for generations. They are soon joined by Jesse’s goofy friend Charlie (Jonathan Stark), who brought along his diva girlfriend Lana (Amy Yasbeck), in the hopes of being discovered by Kate, who works for a record company. Jesse has returned to this old family mansion after his parents were murdered when he was a baby. While going through old things in the basement, Jesse finds a picture of his great-great grandfather (and namesake) in front of a Mayan temple holding a crystal skull with jewels in the eyes. In the background is a man Jesse learns is Slim Razor, a former partner of his great-great grandfather turned bitter enemy after a disagreement over who would get to keep the skull.

A young inductee into the military is given the task of looking after some chimpanzees used in the mysterious “Project X”. Getting to know the chimps fairly well, he begins to suspect there is more to the secret project than he is being told.

Nobody believes teenager Charley Brewster (William Ragsdale) when he discovers that his suave new neighbor, Jerry Dandrige (Chris Sarandon), is a vampire. So when the bloodsucker starts stalking Charley, he turns to has-been actor Peter Vincent (Roddy McDowall), famed for portraying a ghoul hunter. Unfortunately for the would-be vampire slayers, Dandrige has set his sights on Charley’s girlfriend (Amanda Bearse) in this clever spoof of the horror genre.