Bob Hope is a New York theater critic and his wife (Lucille Ball in their final motion picture pairing) writes a play that may or may not be very good. Now Hope must either get out of reviewing the play or cause the breakup of his marriage. Based on the Broadway play by Ira Levin.

Lieutenant Rip Crandall is hoodwinked into taking command of the “Wackiest Ship in the Navy” – a real garbage scow with a crew of misfits who don’t know a jib from a jigger. What none of them knows, including Crandall, is that this ship has a very important top-secret mission to complete in waters patrolled by the Japanese fleet. Their mission will save hundreds of allied lives – if only they can get there in one piece.